I'm Done Trying

I hate it when people say things like, "You can do it" to me when I express some situation I am dealing with or some task I need to complete. I am a driven person and I rarely give up on something once I've started. So, when I say I am having difficulty with something or when I say there are just too many things I have on my mind, and then my friends are like, "oh, I know you can handle it" it shows a complete misunderstanding of who I am.

The whole point is that I CAN'T anymore! If I am saying I am overwhelmed it is because I AM! I no longer have the strength to deal with all the crap on my plate.

I know they mean well. They want to encourage me to keep moving forward and not give up hope. Fine. But stop telling me I can do things. I can't do anything by myself. I should know, I have been trying to for years and failing at every turn. I screw up everything I try to do myself. I need God's strength to get me through. I need His wisdom and help to fix all the problems I have caused.

I am not the Little Engine Who Could. I can't... and I'm tired of trying.

So... I quit.

I quit trying to make relationships work. I quit trying to feel/look happy all the time. I quit having to finish all the stuff I set out to do. I am just done.

I'm done doing everything and being everything that everyone wants me to be. I'm done...