Good Enough

Why is it that one little remark can stop me dead in my tracks and make me feel like I am just not good enough?

Tonight I was out with some friends whom I haven't hung out with for a while and we were just playing Euchre and having fun. I may (or may not) have said a couple things that sounded a little rough around the edges - I don't really know since I am so used to and comfortable with who I am in that regard - and then my one friend made some comment about me being a little crass with my language. I replied with something to the effect of, "well that's what I am around all the time" (referring to the interesting and colorful language of a vast majority of the teens whom I work with).

The language doesn't bother me, but I keep forgetting that sometimes it bothers other people.

The point is, as I drove away tonight it kept bugging me why I was so concerned with what others thought of me. I mean, I have my failures and imperfections. I screw up and I know my bad habitual sins. And I wish I could fix those things in my life. Yet, I am, for the most part, content with who I am. I know who I am at least and am satisfied to remain me until God decides to change me.

Yet, for some reason I want to be good enough in others' eyes. I want them to like me and all that crap. Hmmm... so stupid really. Why does it matter what my friends think of me? Or anyone for that matter? I am ok with me; and it really doesn't matter what others' opinions of me are.

But I still keep trying to be good enough... even when its apparent I'm not...

Guess they'll just have to get over it and accept me for who I am. Cause I'm not changing anytime soon...