To Be a Woman of God...

So, I just finished this book I received as a gift a few months ago titled "Have I Kissed Dating Goodbye?" by Carolyn McCulley. When I got it I was like, "ok... why am I supposed to read this?" But as I got further and further into the book I realized more and more how I needed to hear what she had to say.

Usually I will highlight a lot of ideas that impact me in books like this, but in this particular book, few things are highlighted, but what is are things that hit me really hard and I am still thinking through.

The first thing was "[Women] are designed by God to be helpers and to make men successful." This is a real slap in the face to those who think women need to be equal to men and have all the same responsibilities and experiences. Eve was created to help Adam be his best, not to be a competitor to him. I loved that she had the guts to write these words, and it changed my perspective towards the men in my life: co-workers, bosses, leaders, pastors, my dad, my brother, etc. I am still wondering what that will look like to make them successful. What exactly do I need to do to accomplish this?

Another thing that hit me strongly was when she was discussing physical beauty. Sentences like "we are asking Christian men to commit themselves to be faithful to one woman for the rest of their lives. Wouldn't it bless them if we were the best we could be, both spiritually and physically?", "men notice beauty" and "women should want to be attractive, especially to their husbands... we should strive to care for our appearance" really woke me up.

I am not a shabby dresser, I try to look presentable and nice, but I don't put hours into getting ready every day. I rarely wear makeup and I don't dress up too often. I have always thought that a man needs to be attracted to my inner beauty rather than my outer beauty, but after reading what Carolyn had to say I realized I need to strive to be beautiful in all ways because that is a main thing I have to offer to the world - beauty, in all its forms. Therefore, I need to take care of myself better, which includes exercising more regularly, eating more healthy foods and dressing up more often. :)

One final thing that really struck me as I read this book was her discussion of the quiet and gentle spirit that Peter refers to in his letters. For the past four or five years I have been mulling over this verse and asking God to make me into a woman with a quiet and gentle spirit. I have come a long way, but I still need some work. What she had to say hit me right in the gut and made me realize just how far I still have left to go.

"A woman who is quiet and gentle is not contorted by stress, anger, or impatience. Her laughter, and not her frowning, is etched in the lines of her face. There is no turbulence in her air space from her agitation and distrust. She's not wound so tight that she vibrates with irritation and anxiety... She trusts the Lord."

Ouch... what big shoes to fill. I frown more than I laugh, I am agitated and agitate people more than I am calm and soothing. I am wound tight most of the time. It sucks, but I still need so much change to happen in my heart before I can be considered a quiet and gentle woman.

There were many other things in this book that affected me greatly, but those were the most impacting. I am grateful to have had this book placed in my hands. I thank the person who gave it to me. I have realized a lot about myself and I have grown a lot more comfortable with my singleness than I ever was before. For this I am grateful and at peace with. Yay! :) God is good!